sex with no strings is fun, but sex with strings can be so much better. i don’t think that you are emotionless, just used to it. a wise friend of mine gave this advice to girls, “don’t ever let a guy fuck you, fuck them.” that doesn’t mean to be a bitch, or that you have to be in control, you just do it on your terms. if you don’t want to, don’t. you probably don’t realise how beautiful you are. you don’t need to have sex with anyone for any reason unless you want to.
and i don’t think that it is pitiful. i think when you are finally with someone you truely care about, you will appreciate it much more than the average person. you only know how good the good things are if you have been through the really tough times.
when you do find that person, be vulnerable and don’t be afraid of getting hurt. given your age, you probably will be hurt, but that’s life. you will only get the really good times if you can also accept and understand that the really bad times will come too. the higher you climb the further the fall. enjoy the good and don’t worry about the bad, everything passes.
i’m glad that you don’t regret anything because you shouldn’t. it’s pointless and wouldn’t help anything. please keep me updated and take care of yourself, i give a fuck about you.
-m
